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Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) affects virtually all aspects of life, with romantic relationships being some of the most impacted interpersonal connections.
Mick Hartnett, chief operating officer at veteran-focused psychiatry practice Medilinks Australia, has explained that serving in the Defence force can create a disconnected and strained relationship for the serving person and their partner.
“When you are serving, the job comes first,” he said.
“You move where you are posted and you miss important moments like birthdays, anniversaries and Christmas. Those moments add up.
“You are in survival mode, but at home, your partner is watching the news, worrying, and filling in the gaps with their imagination. That disconnect can create real stress on both sides.”
Over 70 per cent of couples where a partner suffers from PTSD report having “significant” relationship distress.
Hartnett, who is also an Australian Defence Force veteran, said that understanding and acknowledging the major challenges and sacrifices partners make is critical as “in many ways, the partner is serving too”.
“Research shows partners of veterans with PTSD experience higher levels of distress and lower wellbeing.
“Over time, constantly supporting someone through trauma-related symptoms can also lead to secondary trauma … if all the focus is on the veteran, the partner’s needs can quietly fall to the bottom of the list.”
Due to the undefined, somewhat stigmatised nature of this facet of PTSD, partners are less likely to reach out for mental health support services.
Charities such as Salute for Service which look at whole-of-family transition during deployment, holistic support like Medilinks, or general telehealth services for families and partners living in regional areas are useful resources that can support partners of veterans.
“We need to broaden the conversation to include the people standing beside our veterans.”
“When we support their support system, everyone is stronger.”
